The early moments of a miracle

Dec 2012 -
So here is an update for everyone - after peeing on at least a dozen sticks, having a series of blood work done...

We are pregnant! 

I know my last post was a bit ambiguous, but I really didn't have my thoughts together yet.  And it still feels a little surreal; we have done so much and been through so much over the past year and a half.  And I honestly had no expectation for this last cycle - my follicle was small, my lining not getting any thicker - basically we were gearing up for another step up in treatment.  The doctor's office discussed it as "just in case you don't get pregnant this time" but I was mentally already there.  Since the AS diagnosis and all the procedures, nothing about my cycle is the same as before so I partially took the first test to make sure I wasn't missing a day to start the next round of treatment.  I set it down and went about the evening - and that second line was so faint I wasn't sure I was seeing it.  I asked Chris what he saw - 2 lines.  So I took another, and the next morning another.  Even after calling the doctor and having some blood work I took another...and the lines kept appearing, even getting darker.  What do you know, they work?!   

Trying to figure this all out really started late summer of 2011 with a series of trial/error that "should do the trick."  Each failure convinced me more that something wasn't right.  Now its been almost a year since the idea of Asherman's was presented to us.  Not to mention the emotions of mourning children that would never come to be because nothing more could be done for us - the suggestion we consider surrogacy or adoption or make ourselves satisfied with one pregnancy.  The series of procedures, medications, evaluations, complications, insurance battles, innumerable question marks and research upon research upon research - it has been quite the experience. 

And now here we are.  Of course you all will be getting this in a couple weeks - it seems too fragile to put out there entirely right now.  I realize it wouldn't change the outcome, and our doctors are quite happy with the lab work - but I can't take a full breath quite yet.  Now we wait for the magic US that will hopefully show us the little bean's heartbeat - and only then will I fully exhale.